On December 26, 2011, legendary business tycoon Santa Claus stood in Times Square before more than twenty thousand Americans and made an announcement that shocked the world: “Effective on February 29, 2012, I will be resigning my position as CEO of the North Pole. My age is beginning to get the better of me, and [...]
Feb 13 2012 | Posted in
2012,
Historical |
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You may have been told that the phenomena we know today as rap music began in the late 1970’s. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way, the true history was lost. Kept out of textbooks and censored from our fragile ears. Lucky for you, the Deadbeat is the only one who’s got the facts… 2,012,000 B.C. [...]
Nov 14 2011 | Posted in
2011,
Historical |
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One conquistador named Cortés (known as virtually the only historical figure in English history books to get an accent mark in his name) ended up in Mexico. The non-lethal Aztecs who had just finished viciously conquering the area thought the Spaniards were gods. Cortés encouraged the rumor, presumably after hitting his head on a rock [...]
Mar 8 2011 | Posted in
2011,
Historical |
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The Late 1400′s Around the Globe: Same Old “Indians” and Europeans started trading. FRENCH TRADER: I’ll trade you twenty knives for the enslavement of some of your people. INDIAN: … FRENCH TRADER: Twenty knives for taking your land and forcing you to live on reservations? INDIAN: … FRENCH TRADER: I’ll throw in a few malaria-ridden blankets if [...]
Dec 20 2010 | Posted in
2010,
Historical |
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Twenty thousand years ago, there was an ice age. PALEO-INDIANS: Hey, here’s a brilliant idea! Let’s walk across a giant snowy land bridge to reach a continent that we don’t even know exists! Eight thousand years and a heck of a lot of frozen Paleo-Indians later… PALEO-INDIANS: Oh, no! Global warming is killing off the [...]
Nov 26 2010 | Posted in
2010,
Historical |
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