Freshman Switches from Being Outcast at Weston to Being Outcast at Allen

It’s not easy being green. Just ask John Grimps, freshman in LAS, who has struggled at acclimating to dorm culture.

 ”At first I thought it was living in the Six Pack, and not fitting in with the alcohol scene,” Grimps said. “But the artists hate me just as much.”

 A change of pace was recommended by multiple counselors and psychologists. They would not let Grimps move out of the dorms, but encouraged him to seek greener pastures through Allen Hall. Known as a dorm for the “artsy” people (see: ego), this would be different than Weston, dorm for the “cool” people (see: ego).

 ”In the end, I guess I either don’t fit in or everyone else sucks,” Grimps said, as he dramatically ripped down a name tag from someone’s door. “I’m thinking it’s everyone else who sucks.”

 But his former roommate from Weston tells a different story.

 ”He was weird, detached,” said Henry Livenston, sophomore in Kinesiology. “We invited him out to the Red Lion once but he told us he was afraid of animals.”

 Living in the dorms is supposed to be an environment of community, but for Grimps, it was an environment of pain.

 ”I just hate it here. Everyone is so full of themselves and refuses to talk to me. Why should I even waste my time talking to people? I’m happy being alone,” Grimps said. Unable to fit in, Grimps finds solace in Sunday morning brunch.

 ”I get there super early to take the giant table. That way, somebody is almost guaranteed to sit with me. It’s very busy, and they have strawberries.”

 When asked on future living plans, for next year, Grimps is confident that through an apartment, he will work something out.

 ”It’s just a matter of finding somebody on Craigslist, which I can do,” Grimps said. “Heck, maybe it’ll even be a girl. That would be something. Then she’d have to talk to me!”

– Aaron Toch

Photo by exalted

Short URL: http://www.deadbeathumor.com/?p=309

Posted by on Nov 10 2011. Filed under 2011, Viewpoints. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry

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